High On Myself

Hi - Carl Kinsella.

Blogs seem pointless until you've actually amassed some kind of followings, so instead of givings opinions on things, I'm going to give a list of things I have opinions ON.

1) Everything
2) Anything


more is to come should anybody at all subscribe. plus poetry.

Poetry

And The Blame For This Will Rest With You Forever
you were incredible
and i remember the day we met
and we talked about the who
and america and chocolate

you were incredible
and i remember the day you left
and how i spent my day lying
on the dining room table

you were incredible
and i remember the day you said
you said you were crazy about me
which isn't true anymore

you were incredible
and i remember the day you made me
everything i will ever be
and that still might turn out to turn on me

you were incredible
and i remember the days we'd spend
talking about things you wanted to
because i had nothing but you in my head

you were incredible
and i remember the day i realised
how beautiful you were
and just how much your departure would hurt

you were incredible
and i remember the hundred ways
i said goodbye, confessed my love
and listened to you say it too

you were incredible
and i remember last summer
and being besotted with a girl
not even half as amazing as you

you were incredible
and i remember and always will
that you are no longer a part of my life
and i must make decisions accordingly

you were incredible
and i remember you, ********
i remember everything about you
so please don't forget me

you were incredible
and i remember things that are in the past
and you WERE incredible
and i hope you still are.

because i love you.




Modern Bombs Don't Tick

i've been wrong a hundred times
i didn't want to be
but if i'm wrong this time, christ
it would really rather suit me

i turned on the television
to turn off my insides
so i won't have to face decisions
and i won't have to cry

i felt sick this morning
so i'm gonna sleep today
and if i want to stop mourning
i'll dream it all away

i know where to go and know
exactly who to see
if i really want to find out
what else i can be

i feel like i'm hung from the cross
but it's my nails in my palms
my crown is just my heavy thoughts
my heart is just a bomb.

i feel like i'm destined to be
a watered-down pete doherty
i feel like i'll grow up be
a watered-down pete doherty.

A Revelation

I sat and tried to write some poetry
And found my attempts embarassing and
Pretentious taking their inspiration
From the empty expanse of my mind

And I tried to read some poetry
Or what seems to pass for poetry
And I tell you, as awful as it is
The worst thing about it is I can't do any better

And I tried to live some poetry
But there's really only so much whiskey
My system can take, before it rejects
Absolutely everything.

And interestingly enough, this is poetry
And that was far from my intention
I just have no other means of complaining
About how dreadful all art seems to me

Because I can't paint and I can't sing
And frankly, my ability with regard
To music as a whole is more than 'limited'
And all dancing looks ridiculous, no question

And books have all become contrived
And movies have all become the same
All fall to the same damn background
With no impact on the score of the game

And no it doesn't make me laugh
Nor does it make me want to cry
It doesn't make me feel a thing
Except the will to die

This poem only took four minutes to write.

_______________________________


A Streetcar Named Futility

Awash with your beauty
And covered in scars
And waiting on a miracle
To fall from the stars

Waiting on a barren shore
It doesn't know the water
Lay me here forever more
Or just lead me to the slaughter

I try to steady up my heart
I try to steel myself for this
I fall to pieces anyway
Because my heart took aim and missed

And every move it made was a mistake
And I think I barely noticed
Because these are mistakes I continue to make
And I feel you should know this

But if I were to tell you
It would only make things worse
So I'm looking to the sky, looking for a sign
After nailing my coffin and driving my hearse

We ruined my life as a team
And now I can't love anyone else
Because reality doesn't measure up
To the fantasy I created with your help

And now you've left me, low and dry
Under these blinding-bright lunar night stars
Thinking of you, and thinking too hard
Awash with your beauty, and covered in scars
__________________

Withdrawal Symptoms

I broke into a fever, and my eyes began to burn
And my jaw begins to ache, and I sweat and toss and turn
And I try to think some happy thoughts, but I can't think at all
I tried to call your name, louder than your ghost seems to call
Shattering my eardrums and ripping through my brain
You are my heroin, you are my cocaine
But heroin can't inject itself, and that's what makes you worse
And I refuse to get out of bed, because the sunlight hurts
It's too late to pull the knife out, when you've already been knifed
And I know that I'll bleeding for you for the rest of my life
And you're walking away and you don't want me to explain
That you are my heroin, you are my cocaine
I'm sick in the head, and my stomach is sicker
And the flames behind my eyes dance and flicker
And my knuckles are bloody from hitting the walls
And my ears are now bleeding as your shrill ghost calls
And I'll hold the knife to my throat and push it deeper again
Goodbye my heroin, goodbye my cocaine